#but not sure which
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👀 i haven't live-blogged watching something in a while...and since i've found gallowglass i think it's only fair that i talk to myself about one of michael sheen's first roles. as a treat.
#alysha.txt#gallowglass#michael sheen#last one was a movie with ralph#but not sure which#maybe the last POW bobby garwood story? hmm idk
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unoriginal joke
#Gravity Falls#Stanley Pines#Stanford Pines#Ford Pines#Stan Pines#shitpost#I put the ID in the little thing tumblr has for it this time because I am still experimenting with which is best wah#This joke has been made before I am sure of it but.
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When I was a kid my family pretended to get raptured so I would think I was left behind on earth while they all went to heaven.
I was like 8 years old and my sister and mom had gotten really into the Left Behind novels (bible fan fic about the rapture). In the books when the rapture happened the clothes that people were wearing when they got raptured were left behind in neatly folded piles.
One day when I was getting home from school my family decided that they would leave piles of neatly folded clothes around the house, and then hide in the basement.
The intended effect was that I would get home and see the clothes then, think that my family had been raptured and that I wasn’t good enough to get into heaven… or something?
The problem was that I had never read these books, and didn’t really think about the rapture very often. There was no reason that I would see some laundry on the floor and think “The rapture happened and I’ve been abandoned by God! I’ll never see my family again!! Oh nooo!!!!”
I just sat down and watched cartoons and eventually my family got bored and revealed that they were all hiding in the basement.
It’s a good thing I didn’t understand the joke, otherwise that shit would have been traumatic.
#still not really sure what part of this joke was funny?#cuz if the prank had worked#then they would have made an 8 year old think she had lost her family and been rejected by god#which isn’t really much of a joke#Christian’s are weird yall#pirateprincessjess
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hindsight
[ID: A two-panel comic with crudely drawn stick figures.
Panel 1: The lime green person is talking to the leaf green person and the moss green person.
Lime: "I... have a confession to make."
Leaf: "Go ahead."
Lime: "I want to rewatch the Wizard Child movies."
Leaf: "Didn't the wizard author get incredibly chromophobic?"
Lime: "Yeah I just... It's nostalgia you know? They meant a lot to me when I was a kid."
Panel 2: The three are on the couch.
Lime: "All right, let's go."
Leaf: "It's so weird how the wizard author just turned chromophobic though. Like I remember this series being pretty good for its time. It'll be weird seeing their work contrasting with their views now."
Moss: "I'm just glad we got the movies for free through normal and legal means. Heh."
End ID.]
[ID 2: Scenes from three Wizard Child movies.
Wizard Child and the Simplistic Morality: A slightly round child with a propeller hat is talking to a child with no hat.
Round child: "I am so fucking fat and greedy I am textually shown to be fat because I am greedy and also evil."
Hatless child: "You are to infer my moral purity from juxtaposition with this fat child. Woe is me for our shared parent has deprived me of a propeller hat."
Wizard Child and the Goodness of Wealth: An adult wizard is talking to the child, who now has a wizard hat.
Wizard Adult: "Wizard child you are secretly extremely rich."
Wizard Child: "I will form biases regarding the bankers all being triangular for some reason!"
Wizard Adult: "Your wealth is deserved because your true parent was Good and therefore you are also Good."
Wizard Child: "Now we should acquire consumer goods. Buy consumer goods!"
Wizard Child and the Dark Family History: A blue-grey horse person is talking to the wizard child.
Blue-grey: "No, wizard child. You don't understand. I am one of the good ones, because unlike the bad ones I don't try to spread my curse that makes you a blue-grey horselike creature to others!"
Wizard child: "Wow uncle blue-grey you are one of the good ones! I forgive you for being a horse because I am so good I would even forgive horses. I sure hope you don't conspicuously get killed off later in this movie!"
End ID 2.]
[ID 3: Oh hell no there are even more of these.
Wizard Youth and the Tokenistic Relationship Dynamics: A square headed wizard youth is talking to the former wizard child, now a wizard youth.
Square Wizard Youth: "Wizard child, as the only person with a square head in this entire series it is my duty to inform you that you are the savior of all people with square heads, too. Let us build a one-sided relationship that only furthers your character development, after which I will immediately lose all plot relevance."
Wizard Youth: "I will do this because I am a maturing wizard youth and need disposable relationships that don't threaten the endgame!"
Wizard Youth and the Escalation of Stakes: The Dark Wizard, a sort of grey-green person with a cloak, is pointing at Wizard Youth.
Dark Wizard: "Wizard Youth, I have returned!"
Wizard Youth: "Dark Wizard! Why are you green now?"
Dark Wizard: "Evil magic made me green! I am green with envy towards all who are good!"
Wizard Youth: "I will not engage with how you are clearly based on fascist ideologies and yet this narrative plays into fascist aesthetic sensibilities!"
Wizard Youth and the Post-Hoc Revelations: The Wizard Youth is leaning over their Wizard Mentor, who is laying in a pool of blood.
Wizard Youth: "Wizard Mentor no! You can't die!"
Wizard Mentor: "It is fine, wizard youth. My death will further your character development into a wizard adult. Also, I was secretly a very very dark purple this entire time. I never brought it up so I could retain narrative approval.
End ID 3.]
[ID 4: Wizard Adult and the Overdue Conclusion. Three panels. I am sorry.
Panel 1: The dark wizard is dueling the Wizard Adult with magic beams.
Dark Wizard: "Evil green beam!"
Wizard Adult: "Good red beam! Despite the enormous variety of magic in this series this is what our final battle looks like!"
Panel 2: Wizard Adult stands victorious over the dark wizard, who is dying on the ground.
Wizard Adult: "In the end, dark wizard, you were defeated because I am morally superior to you."
Dark Wizard: "I was a product of systemic failures. There will be someone like me again someday!"
Panel 3: Zoom in on wizard adult, who says:
"Not if I can help it. Because I am going to be a wizard cop now. The moral of this story is that all systemic issues can be solved by finding a bad guy to beat."
End ID 4.]
[ID 5: Four panels.
Panel 1: Return to the green trio on their couch, watching the TV say "The End." All are are silent.
Panel 2: They are sitting on the couch. Moss is looking at their phone.
Lime: "Yeah so there were maybe a few signs we missed because we were children."
Leaf: "Yeah. A few. Some."
Panel 3: Continue conversation.
Lime: "So what did you think, Moss?"
Panel 4: Zoom in on Moss, who says: "I've been zoned out on my phone since the second movie. They lost me at the magic stuff. Wizards aren't real."
End ID 5.]
Start - Previous - Next
#why yes I did just make this extremely long#surely there was no more succinct way to do this joke#oh god this keeps escaping the intended audience#which is people who are already familiar with#pills that make you green#ptmyg
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she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.
my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.
my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.
my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.
at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.
my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.
i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.
two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.
it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.
#writeblr#wlw#i often think about like.....#being happy in a gay relationship is sometimes so odd#bc u can forget how stupid ppl are.#bc ur so USED to being gay. and u forget other people GENUINELY ARE homophobic#so it's like. girl pardon?????#but also there are moments where it's like. ohhh the kids are alright#like watching someone razz someone else.... so fucking wholesome#“lemme get this bitche's pronouns before i make gentle fun of them” .... i would have KILLED for that.#THAT is how u know ur accepted#not just tolerated#..... when ppl are like. sure ur nonbinary congrats but WHAT is this fucking sunscreen application#ps idk if "razz'' is a real word but someone asked what it means -#i've always heard it as being a term for 'gentle & friendly teasing'' which like#i personally notice more from my guy friends but is like - when a person isn't#LIKE ACTUALLY teasing u (it's nothing personal/mean) they're just laughing w/you about something#my friends often put on a little voice and call me an anemic little bitch#like 'ooooo the anemic little bitch is cold??? does she need a mouse blanket#bc she's SOOOO SMALL AND ANEMIC???''#and it doesn't hurt my feelings (it makes me laugh very hard) bc 1. i actually called MYSELF that first#and 2. i'm not sensitive about it!!!#a proper razz is when you are ALSO in on the joke - i ALSO think it's funny#for some people i personally find that when they razz u it's when they love u -#they've noticed something genuine about u and love u enough that u know they're not being mean#this is cultural and personality based of course but i'm hispanic#if someone isn't making fun of me it means they hate me . obviously.
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I love how Gerald was trying to keep Shadow from spoiling anything about the future meanwhile literally everything Shadow says and does around Maria is the biggest death flag ever
#in fairness i’m sure both past robotniks just assumed her illness would be what killed her h a#sxsg#sxsg spoilers#sonic x shadow generations#shadow the hedgehog#maria robotnik#ark siblings#sonic#comic#my art#doodles#so this was pretty much entirely done 24 hours ago#but ironically was distracted from posting earlier by playing sxsg#and then watching snapcube play it cause her delight is addicting#i’m missing 2 chests and 2 bolts and I wanna see if I can pull it off without a guide haha#anyways now I’m thinking about the fact that maria and gerald probably went back to their time assuming maria would die of her sickness#and how that would change their respective behaviors#i bet gerald would be holding out that maria would still live a bit longer#just cause shadow inadvertently revealed he’s from at least 50 years in the future due to having met black doom before#(which rewatching cutscenes to remember this quote he Did try to play off a little bit with some sort of#‘oh what do you think the alien squid meant by ’this time i’ll beat you’ that’s so crazy’ comment)#so hey maybe it wasn’t a perfect cure but she managed to live another 10-20 years at least?#all the more reason to press harder surely!#meanwhile maria is coming to terms with her mortality at age 14 or whatever she is#frankly I bet she came to terms with it long ago the way she seems to be written#okay back to snapcube
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If my mom sees a significant amount of blood she gets lightheaded, and has fainted on some occasions. Once it happened when we were kids, I wasn't there to witness it but I heard the story from my dad. Basically my brothers, around 7 or 8 at the time, were playing outside while my mom was making their lunch, and she accidentally cut her finger. It wasn't anything serious, but it drew a fair bit of blood and she passed out. My dad saw this and rushed over, but he didn't really know what to do so he just sort of started slapping her to wake her up (not recommended, but he had no idea and panicked)
At that exact moment my brothers both came in from playing, and all they saw was our mom unconscious on the floor and our dad slapping her. So, like, without even saying a word to each other they both just INSTANTLY start whaling on him, like, full blown attack mode to defend our mom. Which obviously didn't help the situation, but she did wake up and everything was fine.
Now our dad says that he's actually really glad they attacked him over what they thought was going on, because it means he raised good boys. And I still think that's true, they're very good boys.
#i think about this story sometimes like yeah I'm proud of them for that too actually. good job baby brothers#they're not babies anymore of course they're turning 20 next year which is crazy#but they're still the type of people who'd do something if they saw something of this sort happen for sure#respectful of women and everyone else too. they're good guys#I'm glad I ended up with them living in my house against my will for like 14 years#anyway i have no idea where i was for all this but my best guess is probably a friends house given the time period#i was always at my besties house lol#i hope she's doing well too actually. haven't spoken in forever...#bestie from greek elementary school... if you're out there... let's get muffins and fanta at the bakery across the street again someday 💜☮️
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that broken doll face trend but make it rose quartz
#not sure which version looks better so here's both!#steven universe#rose quartz#pink diamond#steven universe fanart#my art#i tried to make the inside look like a gem but idk if that comes across
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ppl are unironically saying kamala ran a "perfect campaign", it's almost comical how dedicated dems are to never learning a goddamned thing
#major protagonist syndrome#for a start I'd like to think a perfect campaign would've won cause the other guy's sure as hell wasn't perfect#otherwise you're admitting democracy doesn't work which is valid but then a little silly to be so mad at non-voters
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#pjsk#project sekai#mizuki akiyama#date of me making this post: july 20th 2024#im making this now and sticking it in the drafts for when mizuki gender reveal happens#making this under the assumption that yes she is transfem#if she isnt then well you wont be reading these tags on this post to begin with#which at the time of me writing this we do not know for sure!!! i can not see the future!!!!#but if youre seeing this that means mizuki trans real yayyy yippeeee#congrats to mizuki on the fun gender from past me#10/12/24 update: ok it wasnt EXPLICITLY confirmed but im posting it anyways lolzor
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Jason’s alcohol tolerance is exactly 0.09%, which Dick knows. Which is the primary reason he roped his siblings into playing a drinking game.
At most, Steph, who likes to think she’s fluent in Jason, — or Batboys with repressed emotions, at least, — anticipated the following:
Angry shouting, maybe some swear words God definetly didn’t approve of, trying to fist fight Alfred’s plants, painting the Batmobile pink, and the works.
She definitely didn’t expect a ruby cheeked Jason to cry in Bruce’s lap.
“What the fuck are we gonna do if we don’t know eachother in the next life, huh?!”
Tim piped up with an a nerdy rant, — technically, if life were to reinvent itself into another existence, it’d simply be an alternative universe being created, — but Jason simply throws his shoe at him.
Bruce, much to Damian’s pride, doesn’t look shaken in the slightest. If he can handle his mother, he can handle everything,
“Sweetheart, I really think that’s not going to happen, thought,” he assures him with gentle conviction.
“But we’re not gonna know eachother! What the FUCK. I want to be your son in every life. I’m gonna kill God.”
“Please don’t kill God.”
“We’re Jewish, what do we care?!”
“Jay,” Bruce promised, “I would find you in every universe.”
That was supposed to make Jason feel better, not make him cry harder. But it’s cute Bruce tried, Dick thinks.
He still grounds all of them for paining the Batmobile, thought.
#GIVE ME GOOD GOLDEN CHILD JASON#yeah - sure - he decapitated several people and monopolized an entire crime system. but he also doesn’t touch alcohol until he’s 22#stops at red lights. does jury duty#which is counterproductive if you ask him but it’s to annoy Harvey#anyway!! drunk Jason being an affectionate puppy <3333#bruce wayne#jason todd#dick grayson#stephanie brown#batfamily#batdad#text#text post
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made a chart of the straw hats' skin tones with the colors being screencapped directly from the episodes, to show how much they've lightened. this is more than just an "artstyle change" or "design evolution" or "just the timeskip" this is blatant racism/colorism. it's fucking ridiculous and i don't understand how toei is continuously getting away with it please reblog btw, i think this is something people should see
#didnt include chopper/brook/jinbe for obvious reasons but i think even choppers fur has gotten lighter brown#even nami and sanji the characters who were pale from the beginning have gotten PALER#fucking INSANE how much usopp has lightened when you look at it side by side like this. and franky too which i never really took note of#and by “screencapped directly” i mean like i literally screenshotted the characters and zoomed way in#and cropped a square of their face/arm#and made sure it was in average outdoor lighting not mood lighting/dramatic lighting so this is as accurate as possible#one piece#usopp#luffy#franky#nico robin#nami#sanji#vinsmoke sanji#monkey d luffy#zoro#roronoa zoro#casey posts#toei animation#toei#straw hat crew#straw hats#one piece discourse
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We all know the semi-canonical ‘all the Robins know to hide/duck inside of Batman’s cape, even as adults’ thing.
We also know that Danny ‘is LITERALLY a ghost’ Fenton sucks at remembering his own intangibility while ALSO forgetting to look ahead of him.
All I’m saying is, Danny Fenton (or Phantom, if you’d really like) would absolutely SLAM into Batman on accident while running on roof tops and Bruce ‘Brooding Instinct’ Wayne doesn’t even think twice about letting the kid hide and scanning around for danger before there’s a record scratch of ‘wait who tf is this?’ kicks in.
#dp x dc#dpxdc#dc x dp#dcxdp#danny phantom crossover#listen I’m just SAYING#my initial thought is Fenton bc dark hair and how most of the robins have had dark hair#Danny isn’t even necessarily running from danger. he just got into parkour and forgot how to stop his momentum#I mean you CAN have him running from something. give this an ACTUAL plot#but honestly I just think it’d be a fun little setup#Danny peaks out and. in panic. goes#hi we’re the council of the dead. we’ve been trying to contact you and yours about your extended warranty#*extended life warranty or what have you#Danny hasn’t even gotten death vibes from anyone yet so now he has to wing it#yeah hi… uh. Batman sir. if that’s your preferred moniker?#right so we’re basically the ghost irs and you owe death taxes?#yeah you know the saying. death and taxes. guarantees of life. haha.#which in this case means you owe money bc you aren’t dead yet. probably. idk I uh. JUST got the job .#anyways ohhhh hi yep you’re. red hood. yeah so. mm. yeah we definitely need to get you to the ghostly dmv#it’s the same as a regular dmv but people have actually been bored to death in there#(meanwhile Batman is like WAIT IS THIS SMALL CHILD DEAD?!)#(SURE WHATEVER IM RICH HOW DO I FIND A GHOST ACCOUNTANT AND MORE IMPORTANTLY DO YOU RESPECT GHOST ADOPTIONS?)
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ID in ALT Text
sooo... @ranilla-bean wrote a fic The Iconoclast beta read by @faux-fires but before rana and i got to talk lots about sout eats asian clothing and khmer cuture and... i stat down... drew the first one... and the other two. enojoy?
#atla#zuko#druk#ahhh i am not sure how to tag this....#but look at druk!!! look how cute druk is!!!#WE HAVE BEEN ROBBED!#no acctuallyi have been robbed because i asked for 'tiny arms???' on druk#because its cute and hillarious but...#its not accurate...#sadly...#and i also lost smal thin squiggly mustache debate....#which is truly a loss if you ask me!
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I really like the way Giyuu thinks he can make friends with Sanemi is by just hiding red bean mochis in his sleeve and giving it to him whenever. I can just imagine Sanemi having a bad day and it gets 10 times worse when Giyuu comes around because he might think he's making fun of him
Pretty relatable tho I get it Giyuu I get it
#anyways this was just an excuse to draw demon slayer stuff#im getting a bit tired of drawing danganronpa stuff so im taking a break before it makes me hate danganronpa#sanemi shinazugawa#kny sanemi#demon slayer sanemi#shinazugawa sanemi#kny#kimetsu no yaiba#giyuu tomioka#kny giyuu#demon slayer giyuu#kimetsu giyuu#kimetsu sanemi#sanegiyuu#sure why not#which i will continue doing btw
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mumbattan's one and only pavitr prabhakar!!
prints
#pav you ray of joy i hope you never change#spoilers// ngl it is objectively hilarious that miles just. prevented pav from experiencing any hubris#keep on trucking pav im sure the universe wont prove you wrong or anything#also im sorry it took me so long to get to him#ive been busy with hobie brainrot which has alleviated. but it did take buying the artbook and an action figure of him so#anyway im rewatching this movie again on saturday i miss these characters so much#pavitr prabhakar#spiderman#across the spiderverse#spiderverse#miles morales#stillindigo art
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